Insofar as it is possible to be in love with an ever-changing non-human entity, I am.  The non-human entity that I have in mind is technology.  Yet, for all of its wonders, I think that technology is having a devastating impact upon human beings.  Let me explain.

Although faster is often better, faster most definitely is not always better.  Indeed, there are times when faster is downright disastrous.  This is most apparent in the context of social interaction. 

In loves and friendships, there is no substitute for the interaction that takes place over time.  True, some relationships develop more quickly than others.  But none can by-pass bypass regular and frequent interaction.  None can contexts that occasion assessments of trustworthiness, expressions of goodwill, and displays of gratitude.  Loves and friendships without these things will be caricatures at best and vicious forms of self-deceptions as worse. 

Then there is the parent-child relationship.  Nothing on the face of this earth is more re-assuring to children than constant displays of affection from their parents.  Although any given kiss, for instance, that a parent bestows is utterly insignificant, the accumulative effect of each kiss day after day is a veritable tidal wave of affirmation.  A year of not expressing affection towards a child cannot be made up by simply showing that child affection all day long on a single day.  365 kisses in one day cannot equal the re-assurance that comes with a single kiss given day after day for 365 days. 

The fortunate part is that everything that I have just said is manifestly obvious.  The unfortunate part is that doing the obvious has become increasingly difficult in a world that wants everything to happen immediately.  I believe that technology is the explanation for why doing the obvious has become increasingly difficult.

If there is one thing more than any other that has rendered human beings impatient it is technology.  Technology has advanced more rapidly in the last 100 years than in all the previous years put together.  And the technological explosion in the last 10 years or so is absolutely mind-boggling.  The most striking feature of technology is that it gives us access to so much pretty much instantaneously.  And therein lies the problem.  Technology plays a dominant role in a great many lives.  Consequently, expectations regarding technology have unwittingly transferred to human interaction.  Human beings are far less patient with one another.  And this is not good.  For where there is a decrease in patience there is characteristically a decrease in moral sensibilities towards others, including our loved-ones. 

Thus, many children are diagnosed nowadays as having ADD because they won’t sit still for hours on end.  This expectation amazes me, since I do not know many adults who are able to do that.  Then there is speed dating.  I mean why go out on a date with someone—what a waste of time and money—when 10 minutes of conversation with the person will do?  This is rather like going to a movie theatre in the hopes of finding religion.  That can happen.  But it will surely be a fluke if it does.  Then there are the parents who hire a nanny to care for their children around-the-clock, but who get annoyed when the children refer to the nanny as “mommy,” as if the title is secured simply by giving birth to a child rather than caring for her or him.

With technology, we can get results ever so rapidly.  I have just described three very different cases in which the focus upon results overshadows the reality of the human structure in question.  This can happen without technology, as no doubt the nanny cases shows.  But one thing is clear matters have been gravely exacerbated by technology. 

Without a doubt, human beings are remarkably malleable.   But one thing is clear: The excellence that we get out of any form of social interaction will, over the long run, be directly proportional to the excellence that we put into it.  Technology will never change this feature about human beings; and to think that some how it might is to make virtual reality more credible than reality itself.